Well, tonights been an aweful night. It's also been great. My day sucked, as I previously said, but hey, it did get both better and worse. I went to Laurel's this afternoon while cutting Biblical Literature class. That just furthered my disgruntledness (is that even a word?). Mikey was there and he just kind of pissed me off with his constant stoned joking. Normally I love it, and he just cracks me up, but today I wasn't in the mood for it. I lost a few hands of cards to him and to Laurel, I just played like shit. So I went back to school and wrote another fucking entry to you, dear diary. I had to go to work this afternoon, so it was short, hope you'll forgive me. Work was good, I was hardly there at all. I did a cow's eye, had some people scream "ewwwwwww, that's gross" as expected then Caitlin met me for dinner and I took off for about an hour to vent some frustration, anger, and dissapointment to her. She is kind of freaking me out right now. Her pupils were gigantic and she was acting kind of cracked out. I'm afraid she might be using. She said she hadn't tweaked or done anything dumb, but I just get the impression she lies about it just as I did with the big H not too long ago. I worry. She's not too happy at school. I went to visit her a few weeks ago and it didn't seem like she had any good friends down there to keep her out of trouble and keep her sane. I know she'll pull through, I just don't want her to go through what I had to to get out.

Anyway, after that I went back to work and got a call there from Britt who said it was an emergency. She's been on some antibiotics and I geuss they gave her stomach problems and I needed to leave work early to give her a ride to a doctor at like 9:15pm. What kind of doctor's work at that hour? Kaiser I geuss. Seems strange. At any rate, I got someone to cover my shift and gave her a ride and waited with her, then drove her to a pharmacy to get her pills, and then home. Before picking her up I was dissapointed with life, but afterwards I felt good. Still want a relationship, but I feel good. i don't know if it was seeing someone else in pain and/or helping her, or if it was just spending time with Britt. My brother's girlfriend is seriously wonderful, even when she's sick and in pain. It made me happy. So I drove her to my place and then went to Nick's about midnight. We sat around and talked about our messed up lack of relationships and reminisced about people we haven't seen in a long time, things we did a long time ago, and things we're going to do someday. I love him. I can talk to him without any pretense. Without trying to be someone I'm not. It's awesome to have friends like that. Good people. I don't run across too many good people these days. But a day that started horribly got a lot better. The bad things still exist but at least some happiness balances the scales. I'm ready for another day.