I had a very upsetting date. It didn't end up as much of a date. The place we were going to get ice cream was incredibly crowded, so we went back to his place and made dinner with his room mate and his room mate's girlfriend. Then we went over to a different friend's house to watch Simpson's. Finally we went back to his place and talked alone. He is so nice. He is in love with his dog. His dog's name is Gutter. Awesome. Gutter can do a few tricks, and it's cute seeing Erich play with him. He didn't kiss me. When I'd touch his hand, or his arm or anything, he didn't resist, but he sure didn't encourage me. I think I was getting the 'too young to date, old enough to be friends with' attitude. Although I can't really be sure. It doesn't bother me too much if that's true. I wouldn't mind being friends with him, and I'll give it one more shot later this week. But the other boy I like (I realized I really do like him) seems so much better. I doubt he likes me, but I don't really care. It's funny, I've gone from having two unrealizable crushes to having seemingly attainable ones and back in a timespan of less than 24 hours. My mind bothers me. My emotions bother me.

I went shopping today to make myself feel better. It didn't work. I do look hot now, but it didn't work. I am such the typical, no, STEREOtypical gay male sometimes. Hehehehe. I'm hardly flaming, but I do things like that.

This other boy, who will remain nameless until I tell him, seems so much better and more appropriate than Erich. Erich is 23, living on his own. Erich takes road trips in his car across the country and goes alone and sleeps in the car with Gutter. ******* is much more like me. He's attractive in this regard. He's attractive in every regard. I'm not making a comparison between the two. It sounds like it, but it's really not. I like both, but *** is awesome and might not break my heart. He probably will, but who knows? All I know is, I like him.

Here's some poetry for ya: Heart races. Mind races. Mouth opens. Heart breaks.